2 reasons a person with no head can't talk

Ethan: Can you name two reasons a person with no head can’t talk?

Todd: They don’t have a mouth.

Ethan: Correct. That’s one reason.

Todd: They don’t have a larynx.

Ethan: No.

Todd: I give up.

Ethan: They’re dead.

Ethanism

"If you say 'bottle' really slowly and at a low pitch it sounds like a bad word."
--Ethan Tarpley

Samuel's "Back to the Future" Ride

Samuel spent the past six weeks constructing a simulator ride in our living room, which he finally unveiled to the public this weekend.

Visitors watched a pre-ride video in the waiting area.


Then they were ushered into the ride, an 8-passenger DeLorean...


...complete with Flux Capacitor...


...time circuit keypad...


...speedometer...


...plutonium gauges...


...Mr. Fusion...


...and all four of the Tarpley family's laptops, synced up to provide music & sound effects, Biff's in-car monitor, the time circuits, and the main ride video (projected onto the wall).


Seatbelts fastened...


Then...


...lights out and the ride begins!


Afterwards, riders snacked on popcorn and admired details of the vehicle.


Thanks for riding. And remember, the future is what you make it.

Altruism

"Dad, can you believe this whole entire bag is only 99 cents? They should give these to poor people."

End of Summer

All good things must come to an end.

We had a good summer. Samuel grew another inch and got to see the real DeLorean from "Back to the Future." Ethan wrote about 20 picture books and sold them on the sidewalk. Jennifer got to see her family in Illinois. My first book came out and I sold my second.

We went to 3 water parks, 4 municipal pools, 3 beaches, 2 amusement parks, numerous playgrounds, 1 rowboat outing, and 1 river rafting outing.




Of course I think of all the fun things that we didn't do. I always want summer to last forever.

But I know that it doesn't, and that you can either hang onto the past like that guy in "American Graffiti"...


Or you can create the best memories you can and embrace the future.


So...sigh.

Full speed ahead.

Labor Day

Does anyone else find it odd that there's an entire day devoted to celebrating work, and we take that day off?

Rafting the Delaware

Weather.com said mid-70s, but it was the final weekend of summer, so we decided to brave the elements. We even suckered Aunt Donna and Uncle Larry into joining us so that we'd all shiver through the day together.

We arrived at 9:30am to beat the crowd and we were the only ones there. A bad omen. But no line for the bus.


By the time we hit the water it was high 70s, and within an hour it was 80 and sunshine.


Better yet, the water was as warm as bathwater.


Not even a line at the hot dog stand.



Nice way to end the summer.