Goodbye 2011

Another year gone
and not much to report
I'm just not a bold
or embellishing sort

Most of my year was spent
earning a buck
and dreaming of finding
a job that won't suck

I wrote some good stories
or so I've been told
They may become books
but they haven't yet sold

I'm not any wiser
It's sad but it's true
There's practically nothing
I learned that was new

I didn't get famous
I didn't get rich
At least I'm not lying
face-down in a ditch

I stayed out of prison
I stayed deep in debt
I didn't go broke
(Though it may happen yet)

I didn't do anything
shameful or lewd
I didn't tweet pics
of myself in the nude

Or assault a hotel maid
or steal from a granny
or father a child
with the family nanny

I didn't get carried away
in a twister
Or marry a f-ing
Kardashian sister

My children got bigger
so big that it's scary
And one of them even
a little bit hairy

They're healthy and happy
And so is my wife
And that, pretty much,
is what matters in life

So I shouldn't complain
but sometimes I still do
Happy new year to me
Happy new year to you