Saturday, September 16, 2017

It's 2AM

Samuel came home for the weekend. He's asleep on my bed, fully dressed. I went in and kissed his forehead and stroked his hair and whispered that everything will be alright.

Ethan is still up, playing a game on his computer in his bedroom.

I walked the dogs to the deli. The only people on Amsterdam were drunk twenty-somethings coming from the bars. I picked up an orange cream soda for Samuel to have tomorrow, and a diet root beer for me. I told Bobby at the deli that Samuel is home.

I need to go to bed. I'm just enjoying this moment of peace with my boys both here. It doesn't matter that they're in other rooms. They're here with me.

If I were giving advice to Samuel and Ethan, I would say love your own children unconditionally, but after that, spend your energy loving the people who love you back.

It sounds blindingly elementary, doesn't it?

Saturday, September 9, 2017

What I'm working on

I stayed up until 6am last night/this morning writing. Ethan was at Jen's, so it was just me and these loser dogs.

I finished revisions on Naughty Ninja Takes a Bath, which has already been sold and is scheduled for 2019 release.

Naughty Ninja emerged from the jungle after a long day of training. He was covered with river mud, smelly leaves, and beetle dung. Flies buzzed around him.

Crossing one last raging river in his backyard, he entered his secret ninja training camp.

"Ninja need food!" he announced.

“Pee-yew,” said Dad, holding his nose. “This ninja needs a bath first.

I also finished a second draft of Hug One Another, which has not yet been submitted.

Kitty and Kong
did not get along.
Neither could ever admit they were wrong.
[art note: cat and dog]

“You bark at the moon.”
“You sleep until noon.”
“Your fleas drive me batty.”
“You’re bossy and bratty.”

Coming up:

I have an outline of a middle-grade novel called Noodle Boy, about a teen who works at a waterpark, and I need to write the first chapter.

I need to complete a polished first draft of a picture book called Husky & Mac, about father and son diggers. 

I need to revise a picture book manuscript called Bananasaurus Rex, which I liked but my agent Rachel didn't.

Finally, I need to turn a prose manuscript called Helicopter Parents into rhyme. It's a sweet story but didn't sell as a prose book, and I'm thinking maybe rhyme will make it work.

Ethan and I are going to sit next to each other tonight and write until 2. Let's see what magic we can each conjure up.

Thursday, September 7, 2017

LC Kids Season Kick-off

Lincoln Center has an annual series of events for families called LC Kids. The new season begins in a couple of weeks, and I've been invited to do a reading at the kick-off. 

Little, Brown is a sponsor, and they invited me because I've got two LB books coming out in 2018 (Ten Tiny Toes board book and Three Grumpy Trucks). Not saying I'm not a major headliner on my own, just clarifying that it's not like Lincoln Center's VP Marketing burst into the President's office and said, "Great news! We booked Tarpley! And J.K. Rowling is our back-up if he cancels."

I have no idea whether there will be fifty kids or three, but I've always enjoyed doing readings. I love the energy of the kids, and it always makes me smile. There will be music, and I suspect there will be toddler dancing.

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

Last item on the summer bucket list

The boys had never been waterskiing. I hadn't been since 1989.

Ethan and I rented a car on Saturday evening. Samuel took a bus from Trinity to New Haven, we picked him up, then stayed at a hotel in Shelton Saturday night.

This is my tired big boy.

The hotel room had only a king-sized bed, so I had to take this picture.

We slept late on Sunday--no time for the hotel jacuzzi or even the complimentary breakfast. Just enough time for the Dunkin' Donuts drive-through.

The ski rental place was on a wide stretch of the Housatonic River, in Derby. A guy named Gary, who looks like a younger Christopher Lloyd, rents out his ski boat by the hour, including equipment and his services as the driver. 

The boys volunteered me to go first. I managed to get up on one ski after a couple of tries, and it felt the same as it did 28 years ago.

Ethan was next.

Gary gave him some instructions, and he got up pretty quickly.

Ditto for Samuel.

When the boys were toddlers we used to pretend to waterski in swimming pools. I was the ski boat. They'd stand on my bent legs in the water, facing me, and hold my hands, then I'd tell them to say "Hit it!" Then I'd pull them around the pool making motor boat sounds.

I have to confess, I got a little teary eyed yesterday hearing them say "Hit it!" in their deep teenaged voices.

My little boys. My big boys.

I never like to see summer end. But that's why we have summer bucket lists, so that we make the most of it. Cherish it.

I've said this many times, but I'll say it it again. When Samuel was born I vowed I'd never complain about anything for the rest of my life. There's so much misery and human suffering in the world, that to be blessed with this little human being...then with two little human beings....

Believe in God or believe in a cold universe, but don't be ungrateful for what you've been given.

Sunday, September 3, 2017

Dropping off Samuel

Jen and I drove Samuel back to Trinity yesterday for the start of his sophomore year.

His new dorm is nice. He already knew his roommates. It was a much easier drop-off than last year. But still  poignant because so much has changed.

It was the first time Jen and I had spent much time together since she moved out in May. In a way it felt like we picked up where we left off: I insisted on taking a shortcut to the dorm, which turned out to not be a shortcut. (Jen just rolled her eyes.) Jen couldn't find her car keys at one point. (I just rolled my eyes.) And we went to Walmart to pick up a few things (of course), and Samuel and I lost Jen because we were fooling around (of course).

It was a good day. Wistful. I hugged my Samuel very tight. And when Jen dropped me off at my apartment, I said, "Thanks," almost adding "Sweetheart" out of habit.

Things change. People change. You find your equilibrium and move forward.

Monday, August 28, 2017


I'm grateful for this weekend. I'm grateful for my boys. I'm grateful for the life I have, imperfect and mangled and unrecognizable though it may be compared to a year ago.

The boys and I saw a movie in Central Park on Saturday night. The Central Park Conservancy set up a giant screen near 72nd Street.

The movie was "Spider-Man 3." Not that it mattered. But it was a story of good overcoming evil, and it never hurts to reinforce that message. It was a beautiful evening in the most beautiful park in the world, with the most beautiful boys in the world.

I miss...

I wish...

I think Jen would've enjoyed it.

Today I took the boys to Six Flags.

We hadn't been since last summer. 

We rode several roller coasters, had lunch, then rode a couple more. Ethan and I rode El Toro, the big wooden coaster, which turned out to be our favorite of the day. 

Ethan told me that he feels closer to both me and to Jennifer than he ever felt when he was younger. He said he knows that most teens grow farther apart from their parents, and that it has been the opposite for him. 

I'm grateful for that, and I'm grateful for him saying it. I'm sure there's some benefit to having more undivided attention from each of us.

When Samuel and Ethan and I were eating lunch, I said, "You know, all of these people here...a hundred years from now...they'll all be dead."

They both looked at me weird.

I laughed and said, "Sorry, I'm actually thinking about how life passes quickly and how important it is to celebrate joy. I was looking at that little girl over there, who's laughing and having such a great time. There were amusement parks a hundred years ago, and they were just like this one, filled with men in their hats and women in their long dresses and little girls laughing, passes quickly, that's all. I'm happy to share these moments with you guys. It was a positive thought, not a negative!"

It's the same feeling of life being short that caused her to go. I know that. I do.

We just have to move forward.

Friday, August 25, 2017

Ethan question

"Dad, what was the name of that music channel thing?"

"I have no idea."

"You know, people used to watch it on TV?"

"You mean...MTV?"