Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Ethan's Fun School, part 2

Ethan says that when he grows up he is going to start a school. Dogs will be allowed. It will cost $100 to go there. There will only be two rules:

1. No hurting dogs.
2. No hurting people.

The kids will decide the name of the school. The choices are:

1. Weird School
2. Place Where No One Learns Anything
3. Have Fun

Sunday, February 24, 2008


Ethan adopted a Who, and Samuel insisted that it be featured here. So he graciously embedded the widget into my blog as a "draft" last night so that all I'd have to do today is send it live. It doesn't entirely work, but...I think that's the fault of the overworked website producers at Fox who were told to stop with all the "testing" and launch the damn thing.

Middle Age

I woke up this morning and thought, "Man, that must've been a tough run yesterday; my legs and feet hurt so much I can barely walk."

Then I realized I didn't work out yesterday.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Friday Night Baths

Jen is at the movies with a friend (so she claims), so the boys and I are having an exciting evening in.

We took a bath, then decided to let Kahlua join us, so now there's water pretty much all over the apartment.

Ethan is walking around nude singing the theme song from the "Wayside" TV show while bouncing a basketball. Samuel is playing on

Kahlua is lying on the boys' bed, recovering from her emotionally exhausting ordeal.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Samuel and Todd's Poll

How big is your booty?
the size of an atom
the size of a squirrel
the size of a basketball
the size of Montana free polls

Sunday, February 17, 2008

The Mysterious Magic Box

Magician Samuel Tarpley is transformed from a normal boy into a black Spaniel puppy when he enters the Mysterious Magic Box.

Cell phones off. Roll tape.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Samuel's Birthday List

#1. Wii system
#2. Mad Science: Bubble Maker
#3. Wii system: Wario-ware smooth moves (for Wii.)
#4. Tri-clops
#5. iCoaster
#6. Roboquad
#7. Airblade
#8. Bee movie video game for Nintendo DS
#9. Hasbro electronic Hyper slide $20 amazon
#10. Track attack
#11. Spy gear, Tri-link
#12. Loony toons, Duck amuck DS
#13. Techno robotic dog
#14. Ice cream maker
#15. Creation station
#16. Fosters: Imagination Invaders DS
#17. SpongeBob Squarepants: Atlantis Squarepantis game DS
#18. Shell Shocker
#19. Net Jet
#20. Alvin and the Chipmunks video game DS
#21. Hotwheels: Trick Tracks
#22. Club Penguin Membership
#23. How to do street magic DVD
#24. Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Games DS
#25. Alex Secret Marker Kit
#26. FX Snow
#27. Klutz-Shrinky Dinks Book

Saturday, February 2, 2008

Ethan's Fun School

Ethan reports that his school doesn't offer chocolate milk at lunch because "they don't like people to have fun."

His plan:

"I'm going to create a school for being fun and breaking the rules. It might be hard to not get arrested. So maybe I shouldn't have a contractor build it. Maybe I should build it myself."

When pressed, he agreed upon one rule:

"No harming puppies."

Friday, February 1, 2008

Chase is run by idiots...hurray

Here's how incompetent Chase is.

I went to the bank today to make our mortgage payment. I didn't have the loan number, so I went to the window and gave them my ID. After a couple minutes of typing into her computer, the teller said, "The loan's not coming up on my screen. You'll need to see Customer Service."

So I went to Customer Service, and, after a couple minutes of typing into her computer, the Customer Service rep said, "I see a mortgage, but it says it's been paid off."

I said, "We refinanced at the end of November."

So she called the mortgage division on the phone. And THEY couldn't find it either.

Chase thinks we've paid off our mortgage.

That's the kind of incompetent customer service that will keep me as a life-long customer.