Wednesday, August 29, 2007

The Tooth Fairy Visits

I know, I know. All Ethan, all the time. We'll try to get a little screen time for Samuel and Jennifer and me. But meanwhile, Ethan lost his first tooth while on vacation in Myrtle Beach, and what was I supposed to do, NOT have a camcorder in his face the next morning? Roll tape.

Myrtle Beach Things

(Sung to the tune of "My Favorite Things")

Dixie flag beach towels and cigarette lighters
Hunting knives, taffy and cheeseburger sliders
Mini golf, Magi Quest, buffalo wings
These are a few of my Myrtle Beach things.

Soft sandy beaches and warm summer breezes
Hank Williams Jr. and NASCAR and Jesus
Pool-peeing toddlers with new water wings
These are a few of my Myrtle Beach things.

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I want a tattoo
I simply remember my fav'rite red state
And then I don't feel so blue.


"Here's a tip: Always be calm when vomiting. Otherwise the vomit will come out your nose."
--Ethan Tarpley

Friday, August 17, 2007


We're in Myrtle Beach, SC. Day 2 of a 5-day mini-vacation. Why Myrtle Beach? Because we love to hang with overweight smokers with mullet cuts and Dixie-flag boogie boards, sure, but also: Myrtle Beach is the home of (angels chorus) MagiQuest.

It's like Dungeons and Dragons for the pre-pubescent set.

It was a success.

Dead Store Walking?

Two weeks ago they had an IRS seizure notice posted on their door, and next to that was an eviction notice for non-payment of rent. In the window was a hand-written sign that said "Don't worry, kids. We'll be open again soon."

I'm an eternal optimist, but even I spoke in hushed tones about this one. Sorry, they ain't coming back, I said to Samuel.

About a week ago I passed by and saw the colorful flags in front, and I smiled. Maybe they still won't make it in the long run. But, as Keynes said, in the long run we're all dead. Life is a series of short runs, so I'm calling this one a victory for the underdog.

Saturday, August 4, 2007

"Say Anything"

Okay, you've been waiting very patiently. Here's the remake of the movie trailer from the 1989 John Cusack/Ione Skye classic.

Ethan Tarpley handles the Lloyd Dobler role, while his former schoolmate (and my favorite girl of all time) Samantha Scheffler IS Diane Court. A superb supporting cast includes Samuel Tarpley, several of his school friends, and even our 4-year-old neighbor Alex, whom we kidnapped from the lobby one evening.

(Look for me as Diane's crusty father--a late replacement due to a camcorder malfunction during filming of Samantha's dad. At least that's the official story.)

And, yes, I know what you're thinking: "John Cusack/Ione Skye classic" is redundant.

Cell phones off. Roll tape.