Ethan is experiencing peer pressure

"Emily says she is going to kill me with a saw and hammer unless I be her friend."

Most Addictive Sound in the World

According to an article in Fast Company, a baby giggle is the most addictive sound in the world.







So I'm not crazy.

Macbeth recital

Samuel's class participated in a Shakespeare "master class" with a panel of theater professionals at his school this week. I know what you're thinking: "Macbeth" is no "Dumb and Dumber" in terms of yuks and pacing. But it's still entertaining in an intellectual kind of way.

Roll tape.

More college options for Ethan

Air University (AL) ("Air from my butt, he-he-he")
Albertus Magnus College (CT) (Latin for Fat Albert)
Butler University (IN) ("BUTT-ler, he-he-he")
Defiance College (OH) ("Try to stop me")
Naval War College (RI) ("Because my belly button is ready to kick some serious butt")
Transylvania University (KY) ("Because I like vampires, dude")

Wimpy Kid movie

Sam: Ethan, there's a new movie you're really going to like.

Ethan: What is it?

Sam: Diary of a Wimpy Kid.

(Ethan goes crazy and runs from the room screaming.)

Happy Birthday, Samuel

Today was your 12th birthday, and now that it's 1:43 in the morning and everyone is fast asleep except me, I want to tell you again how much I love you, how proud of you I am, and how happy I am that we are in this world together and that I am your dad.

I love that you are kind to people. I have seen you touch people's hearts with your kindness, and the world is a better place because of it. I have seen little kids at school come over to you like you are their best friend, and you treat them like they are.

I love that you are such a good big brother to Ethan. He looks up to you, and you keep him from flying off into space.

I love that you are passionate about things. I love that you can spend an entire weekend building a flux capacitor out of a Wheat Thins box and stuff from the hardware store.

I love holding your hand, even at 12 years old, and I love the fact that you are still willing to hold mine. You keep me from flying off into space sometimes too.

I love that you make being a dad the most wonderful thing ever. I believe that someday you will succeed at building a time machine, and when you go back in time to re-live your happiest childhood moments, you will see that those were my happiest moments too.

The instant you were born, I knew that I would love you forever, no matter what. And I do. And I will.

Ethan's new T-shirt

Ethan's favorite catchphrase is, "Aw, skidmarks." I said he should go to college at Skidmore. So...we got him a shirt.

Back to the Future Birthday Party

Samuel had his 12th birthday party this weekend. Each room of our apartment represented a different era, from the 1950s to Cafe '80s to the Old West. (The master bedroom was off-limits, to avoid causing a rift in the space-time continuum.)


The 8-hour extravaganza included a screening of the entire "Back to the Future" trilogy. I haven't seen so many kids sit still for six hours since we super glued the high school bleachers back in '79.


Guests feasted on popcorn, White Castle cheeseburgers, hot dogs, tacos, and chocolate milkshakes. Samuel's birthday cake was inscribed, "Welcome Home Uncle Joey," a movie reference for hard-core BTTF buffs.


No DeLorean this year. Maybe 2011.