Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Questions Couples Should Ask Before Marrying
Important questions from today's NYT, and our answers.
1) Have we discussed whether or not to have children, and if the answer is yes, who is going to be the primary care giver?
I'm happy to say that Jennifer and I discussed this very issue before we were married and were in complete agreement. I said I'd be willing to be a 50-50 partner in terms of caregiving. Naturally, I didn't intend for that to include ancillary things like feeding, bathing, changing diapers, giving medicine, etc. I was thinking that my 50% would include things like, say, "playing games" and "helping open gifts." So, kind of a funny miscommunication there. We've had a lot of laughs about this over the years.
2) Do we have a clear idea of each other’s financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?
Absolutely, and it was good that we broached this issue before our marriage. Essentially, we agreed that we would only spend up to our credit card limits, unless we wanted to buy something like a flat-screen TV, and that we'd never, ever, borrow more from our family than the price of, say, a Bentley. Sad to say, we were never able to adhere to these strict rules. But it will be fun, when we're old, to see how Samuel and Ethan ended up supporting us.