Ethanism

"I like to trick Zoe by using double-reverse psychology."

Jennifer's poignant question

"What books would be in the George W. Bush Presidential Library?"

Sharks in the lobby

Samuel and Ethan got a chance to test out their Christmas gifts.

Mitten makeover

Jennifer bought a cleaning mitt the other day, and when I saw it in the kitchen I thought, "This deserves a better life."


So I bought some ping-pong balls and false eyelashes, and glued a little patch of black fabric in the palm for a mouth. My attention span is six minutes. Fortunately this took five.


So far it gets a thumbs up from Samuel, Ethan, and a baby on the subway. Some things were meant to be.

Just enough snow

"Do you know what I hate about weekends?"

"They end."

DeLorean holiday party

Every time I write a blog entry about attending a DeLorean Club function I have to reiterate that we are the only club members who don't actually own a DeLorean.

But Samuel will be club president someday, so we're just getting him acclimated.

The event last night was an indoor mini-golf party. The highlight was seeing one club member's recently converted DeLorean time machine.


He has owned the car for over a decade and keeps it in great shape. A few months ago he had it shipped to a DeLorean customizer in Texas, who outfitted it with flux bands, exhaust vents, worm hole emitter, Mr. Fusion, and all other necessities for time travel. And for the equivalent of two years of private school tuition, you've got yourself a time machine.

How cool is that?


Cool enough for public school, says Samuel.

Dodgeball Deathmatch 2012

I loved the movie with Vince Vaughn, but I had no idea that actual dodgeball leagues existed until 4pm this afternoon when the guy who sits next to me at the ad-tech start-up I'm consulting for invited me to play with the company team at the season opener tonight.

I said, "No, I don't think so...where is it?"-- thinking that he'd say Brooklyn or Siberia or something.

He said, "Upper West Side."

I was caught off-guard. "Really? Upper West Side?"

He said, "84th between Columbus and Amsterdam."

Damn. Two blocks from my apartment.

And the rest is history. We went undefeated tonight. And I'm not positive, but I'm pretty sure I'm officially the oldest person ever to have played. That's something, right?

Tibetan book reading

This is the worst photo I've ever taken--looks like a game of 3-card monte in the conference room of a Ramada Inn--but it's all I've got to chronicle today's event: a children's book reading at the Tibet Center.

I know what you're thinking: "Todd, you're always hanging out at the Tibet Center."

Samuel and I were invited to help read a series of children's books inspired by the ancient wisdom of--well, some ancient guy, and endorsed by the Dalai Lama.

(Side bar: How about a children's book called "You Can Pet a Dolly Llama, But You Can't Pet the Dalai Lama"? Or is that totally blasphemous?)

After the readings, everyone had to stand in a circle, hold hands (I got an old person instead of a toddler--eww!), and say "One thing I know is..." followed by some bit of wisdom like "The universe is peace," or "We are all one," or "It creeps me out to hold hands with strangers."

It was an interesting afternoon, and I hope they sell lots of books. As for me and Samuel, we remain uptight Western snobs out of touch with our inner karma. And I am at peace with that.

This is why I love Iowa Wrestling

It's not a sport. It's life or death.

Most proud of

Jennifer and I took Samuel to a high school interview this morning. They interviewed Samuel, then they interviewed me and Jennifer. One question the interviewer asked us was, "What is the one thing you are most proud of about Samuel?"

I am probably the only dad to get teary-eyed in a high school interview for his son.

I said I'm most proud of the fact that Samuel is a good person.

He is kind-hearted, he cares about others, and regardless of whatever individual accomplishments he may or may not have in his life, he will make the world a better place by his having been here.

I won't be here forever. God willing, Samuel (and Ethan) will outlive me. I feel like I've helped plant a tree that has grown tall and blossomed, and it's going to provide shade and greenery and oxygen and other good things to the world.

That is all a parent can wish for.