Thoughts on the Pina Colada Song

I don't like Pina Coladas. I don't particularly enjoy being caught in the rain; I don't know anyone who does. I'm not into yoga. I've never liked the taste of champagne. I've never made love at midnight in the dunes of a cape, but it sounds kind of gritty; I would also be concerned about sand fleas. In short, it's safe to say I would never answer that particular personal ad.

I think what Rupert Holmes has captured in that song is the mantra of two alcoholic, self-absorbed losers. Who are covered with sand flea bites.

BTW, if Jennifer ever took out a personal ad like that, and I responded to it, I seriously doubt that we'd both "laugh for a moment" and say, "Aww, it's you." That's just a hunch.